When your time is not enough...
I see myself as a quite good friend. I spend lots of time with them and I'm almost always the one organizing to get my friends together for dinners, parties and other things. But my week just have seven evenings like everyone else's and I unfortunately can't go out every single evening week after week.
Tonight I had to hear from a sweet friend of mine that I'm not a good friend as maybe I won't be able to see her this week. She went on talking saying that she thinks I prioritize my boyfriend and other friends of mine more than her. I got very disappointed hearing this. I believe I'm allowed to do whatever I want and see whoever I want during the week. It is impossible to see all my friends every single week, even if I would be very happy doing it, and that's why I book my evenings for different kind of events with different friends of mine. Some weeks I might see some friends more and the next week I might not see them at all. It's normal, no? I'm trying to see my boyfriend twice a week and I don't believe that is too much either?
Lately I've been very tired and I started to go out a bit less. Both yesterday and today I spent the evenings at home and I don't see anything wrong with that but then I have to hear that I'm not a good friends because of that. No common. It's not right. To be someone's friend should not feel like a demand and it shouldn't put on a pressure. But suddenly I feel stressed. I would like to have more time but unfortunately it's impossible. I love my friends and I think/hope they all know that they are very important for me!